We moved to Ashford, Kent in February 2018, having family and career links with the town and with an aim of launching our own Funeral Directors and settling our ‘new’ family. When I first met Carl Hadaway he was working for an independent firm of Funeral Directors in Deal in Kent and I was working as a Head of Music at a local comprehensive school. I had not previously had any involvement with the Funeral Industry so I didn’t know a great deal about what it entailed and sure enough, I have learnt that this is the case for many and I was not alone! My dad died years before I met Carl but, due to my family set-up, I didn’t have anything to do with the arrangements of the funeral with relation to meeting or choosing a Funeral Director and learning what was involved with this. I wouldn’t have known what the difference was either to be honest and what was the best choice….until now. It is true to say, although I am no perfect consumer (if there is such a thing!), I have grown to respect family owned businesses a great deal over many years now and often find that I despise the dominance of corporate companies with their ‘fat chiefs’ earning slabs of cash making huge decisions without much consideration of conditions and impact for workers on the floor level or for their customers/clients. I would love to see the return of decent bakeries, butchers and green grocers on local streets within walking distance of your home. When I was younger, we had a grocery store, car spare parts store, Chinese take out, Indian restaurant, hairdressers, butchers and bakery down the road from our home and school and my mum used to send me to the shops regularly to pick up supplies. We got to know the families who ran the stores and it meant there was a sense of community. I understand now why so many families in business struggle to withstand the pressures of supermarkets and huge corporations who run down the price of every product they purchase to sell on. I will avoid barking on about this issue as it is not the point of this post, but it is important to mention the value I have of the personal service given by people who are truly invested and care; whether it be the family butchers or your local Funeral Director.

I learnt a great deal about the Funeral Industry from Carl during our first year or so together and indeed part of the reason why we connected as a couple was because we shared the character trait of possessing such high expectations of oneself and showing such dedication in one’s work. We were both equally stubborn, which I see kind of goes hand in hand with this trait! If this ‘will’ is channeled in the right way though, we knew we were on to a good thing! ‘Right’ being for the benefit of your family or for others, such as my students or the families Carl was helping. I know, sadly learning the hard way, that it is vitally important to look after yourself but if your aim in life is to conquer something that directly helps and respects others, it surely can’t be wrong. So, I learnt about the role of a funeral director, the difference between corporate and independent in this industry, the need for independence in this industry, the role of the crematoria, the role of the church and the more I learnt, the more I was interested. I then decided to undertake a Funeral Awareness course with the National Association of Funeral Directors; the NAFD. It was here I learnt more about other religions and their wishes as well as the variations between funeral directors and premises.

Fast forward to our arrival in Ashford and our decision to set up our own Funeral Directors; we obviously did some research of the local companies and what was already on offer. It was clear that there was enough growth in the town to warrant setting up here and also the fact there that was no independent firm in the town itself meant the community would benefit from a local family firm too. I thought it would be useful to write about what we did have on offer in our town for others to read about the options and I will try and keep it as non-bias as possible! This is merely my interpretation of my findings as a member of the community giving an overview of our choices in funeral service.

So, let’s explore our options…if you Google funeral directors in Ashford you find:

  1. ‘Earl & Co’ which is on Albemarle Road in the Willesborough area. I was already a little knowledgeable about this firm before our research into services in Ashford due to Carl’s career history (managing the office when it was run by the Pullen brothers). Carl was very happy and proud working at Earl & Co (this was before their second take over) and has told me about how the firm was respected as the number one ‘go-to’ firm in Ashford, Kent. Earl & Co is now run by a large corporation called Funeral Partners.  Funeral Partners also owns the firm ‘Doves’ which I found to be the next stop on my Google research. Funeral Partners limited was founded in 2007 by Phillip Greenfield. On the website for Earl & Co it is confirmed that it has been a family run firm since 1898; it is not clear then, if it still is in part, however it is very evident that the firm is now corporately run. On the introduction page Earl & Co state: ‘At Earl & Co Funeral Directors we offer a range of funeral options with transparent pricing’…. I looked for their pricing to share the range of costs you could expect here – I couldn’t find the pricing anywhere on the site or via downloadable brochures. I therefore assume you must have to go in and visit the staff to inquire about costs. This wasn’t helpful and I think most of us want to know roughly, at least, how much we are going to be paying before we inquire to give us some peace of mind or security and obviously, the knowledge we can afford it! Perhaps this is something they are looking into developing soon to allow for this ‘transparency’. They offer a huge range of coffins and urns via downloadable brochures and also sell Funeral Plans called ‘Choice’ plans, which are Funeral Partners own plans. Funeral Partners also provide a range of guides that you can download to help you step by step when someone dies, which could be a helpful read at home to take at your own pace. You can find these on their sites. The team includes a Funeral Director and separate staff who administer and arrange so there are different staff for the different stages of the funeral.
  2. The firm ‘Doves’ is found in Kingsnorth Road and is again owned by Funeral Partners so I would guess that the service is very similar if not, the same. The website is almost identical with the exception of the family owned link and the statement about ‘transparency’. There is seemingly lots of ‘Doves’ branches in Kent; the phone number on the website is a Maidstone number but there is also an Ashford number that you can call. I would guess the staff could be posted to different branches? The issue of two numbers from two different towns is a little bit of a muddle but there is a list of branches on the ‘Contact Us’ tab including 9 locations stretching as far as Bromley. So, another corporation similar to the above option (as it is the same corporation!). The front page of the website has useful contact information for Ashford residents and the same downloadable supportive brochures are available. Once again though, no pricing is shared on the website. The staff on the site are staff located at different branches in Kent.
  3. F C Wood’s is another prominent company on Google. It is owned by a different corporation called Dignity. Once again, each website is the same for each branch as you would expect from a corporation. The website is very clear and there is more information here on what they offer and their aims to tailor to your needs. There is a helpful tab on what to do when someone dies and ‘supporting you along the way’ as well as the pricing of two funeral options. You have some idea of price before making contact and to give you more informed choice. The simple option including a hearse, bearers and a Funeral Director is £1995 plus disbursements. No indication is given about cost of coffins or products or the estimated cost of some of the disbursements, which would be helpful as, before I met Carl, I would not know what type of costs are to be added onto the £1995, which for me adds vulnerability. Personally, I wanted to know the rough costs that COULD be added to this figure so I was equipped with a more accurate figure to help me plan. This £1995 could easily reach in the region of £4000+ by the time the other figures are added dependent on some choice. I had no idea of this until I developed my knowledge over the past 2 years.
  4. Co-op Funeral Care is not so prominent as the above but is another corporate firm in Faversham Road, Kennington. You are navigated around the generic ‘Co-op Funeral Care’ site when you select options on the Ashford website. When I clicked on pricing I read ‘Our total average cost for a funeral in 2018 was £3976, including our fees and third party costs.’ They state that the cost is dependent on how ‘grand or simple’ you would like the funeral. Co-op do declare that in 2016 they signed the ‘Fair Funerals Pledge’ promising to be transparent about pricing and to give families affordable options and be open about third part costs. There is a section on what each charge covers which is helpful and the simple funeral is £1895 plus disbursements; slightly cheaper than Dignity but it also includes a simple coffin. There is no choice of day or time for the funeral in this option though and certain days and time might be excluded. This is all clearly stated on the website so the approach does appear to be transparent. The Direct Service is £1,395 with the Co-op which includes a coffin but it does not include any viewing of your loved one and you cannot choose the crematorium; it is all non-attended and alike other Direct options does not include any service. There is a great deal of information on the Co-op site, however it is almost confusing due to the volume of writing – they do have a table that allows you to compare options but no prices are on this table which would be even more user friendly and helpful as navigating the site for all the options is a little arduous. At this point, I found myself wandering who exactly would be looking after my loved one? This was the 4th corporate company that I had viewed and this was my main question at this point with these multi-branch companies.
  5. Country Funerals is a prominent independent option on Google in the ‘organic’ section; the website being set up in 2016. Country Funerals specialises in female-led funerals and is based in a converted barn in the countryside in Westwell; a nearby village to Ashford town. The website does not contain any detailed information about what is on offer or the pricing of any options but states that bespoke services and pre-paid plans are available and the contact us information is clear to learn more about what is on offer.
  6. Albany Funerals is the next company organically in my research and is originally a Maidstone based company that set up a premises on New Street Farm on Chilmington Green Road in Great Chart recently. The site is very contemporary and has a more laid back and casual feel to it with a focus on family; highlighted in the photos of the team. Albany’s advertise as serving the whole of Kent offering traditional funerals, modern funerals and low cost funerals. The focus is on celebration of life and the owner advertises her aim to deliver a personal service in a ‘home-like’ environment at your own pace. A traditional funeral is £1895 plus the cost of a coffin of choice and disbursements; an example is given for Charing Crematorium with a total cost of £3,675 with a traditional veneer coffin. This includes a hearse, funeral director and 4 bearers. A modern funeral is the same price but no examples are given of price, presumably because this is the most bespoke option and the cost could vary considerably dependent on choice. The low cost funeral is £1600 all inclusive and this includes cremation fees, doctors’ fees, their fees and a simple wood effect coffin. There is no service at the crematorium with this option and I am unsure if there is a choice of crematorium. On this page I was led to many more ‘all inclusive’ options giving us more low cost packages and perhaps options we might not have considered asking for but help us save money without losing the option of a service. There is also a clear and attractive products page where you can find out prices of coffins, urns and keepsakes. There is a breadth of information on the site to give you a good idea of what the company offer and allowing you to price compare with other companies before picking up the phone and popping in.
  7. Hadaway & Denton is obviously our company and, although we haven’t managed page one of Google (top of page 2!) yet we are certainly there at the top in the reputation manager if you search for ‘Independent Funerals Directors’ in Ashford! Hoorah! We are in our first year and as stated above, we live in the town and I work for a local comprehensive school teaching music alongside supporting Carl with administration and such like. I am currently focusing, in any spare time I have (teaching doesn’t leave much!) on researching the power of music in helping those with dementia as my previous blogs will highlight. Hadaway & Denton is based in Upper Denmark Road just off Beaver Road in town. As a company, we strive to provide a level of excellence for a fair and affordable price. At the moment, Carl is taking pride in the fact he is the one that answers the phone (at any point in the day or night), he is the one that carries out the removal (with his team, which includes his father), he is the one that meets the family and arranges the funeral and he is the one who directs the funeral on the day, again with the support of his team. He takes pride in every stage of the process and reassures families at each step. I think this is what we are trying to get across most in our website; the level of care and consideration. The website also focuses on cost and there are 3 pathways to look into to try and keep the process simple; The Simple Service, The Personalised Service and The Direct. The Simple Service is £1495 plus disbursements and this includes a wood effect coffin or white contemporary coffin, a hearse and 4 bearers, the Funeral Director and all the professional fees. Comparatively then, we are the lowest price (of those advertised) highlighting our competitive and fair rates. The Direct is from £1315 all inclusive except doctors’ fees if required. Viewing is always included; we don’t believe this should be limited just because a family choose a direct option. The 3rd pathway is ‘The Personalised Service’ which is variable dependent on what choices are made by the family but our price list for the cortege, coffins, products, professional fees and additional time is found on our website so clients can look up their costs before picking up the phone or popping in to see us. Our website shows a sample range of products and more are available if you inquire. Alongside trying to build awareness of our company we are settling our family into the town and learning how we can be a part of the community as this is important to us; we think we can grow and learn to consistently be better the more we know our town. Hadaway & Denton also offers its services further afield, alike the other companies above, reaching nearby towns such as Folkestone, Dover, Maidstone and surrounding villages.

So that’s 4 corporate firms and 3 independents within Ashford and the surrounding villages. My search often brings up other companies that are based slightly further afield (so I could go on…!) and I think more and more firms are advertising a wider catchment area so really the choice is wider than the companies above but I think this gives us a good range of what is on offer and allows the public to make comparisons and informed decisions. Some of the firms not mentioned above are seemingly more internet based or phone based and don’t offer or encourage face to face meetings so I wouldn’t want to include these in the above anyway! It will be a sad day if these kind of companies actually take any lead in the industry. I think it is important to have information out there for people to read and explore more about the company and what its aims and costs are as the whole process is emotionally draining and exhausting, so expecting mourners to drive around and visit each funeral premises, or phone each one in turn, is too much. In my opinion, more information should be online nowadays so the industry is more transparent. When I have spoken to friends, colleagues and families locally many do not know what is involved in arranging a funeral and many do not know what choices they have, and some don’t know their local funeral director/s. The more transparent the industry becomes the more information will be out there for people to become more informed.

See you back here soon when I will be writing about my next visit to St Valery’s where I have had a request to include some Elton John into my set! I haven’t learnt any yet so I need to get cracking!

Take Care

Jo